March 12, 2013
Cycle Day Three
I have been on shots for three days. I am beginning to realize that they are having a great effect on me than they did the first time around. Maybe it is because I was such an emotional wreck the first time from the two years of infertility and trying to conceive not to mention lots of family drama happening around then on top of it.....and now things are pretty great so the side effects are more apparent. I'm on 150 ML of Bravelle and 75 ML of Menopur put together in a nightly stomach shot and I feel tension in my body, especially around my neck and head. I am grateful for the mediation CD's I found specifically geared towards IVF and am REALLY looking forward to getting my chiropractic adjustment on Wednesday.....three days away if I make it until then. I have my first check in appointment tomorrow to see how my body is responding to meds. I have no doubt it will be good news although they could up my meds dosage and we will be adding more meds later in the process. I still have about a week to go (or so) so we are still in the early stages. But I am glad to get this process going. Elijah and I have been out of town for the past several days and before that I was sick so I have lots of cleaning to do at home. I need to get everything in manageable order before the embryo transfer at the end of the month because then I will be on bedrest and then light light duty!
March 13, 2013
Cycle Day 4
I had my first doctor check in today and everything is progressing beautifully. We have eight eggs on one side and six on the other so far with the potential for a lot more. Dr. Williams is increasing my Menopur to 150ml starting tomorrow and I go back to the doctor on Wednesday to check again. I am eating a TON of mono saturated fats to build my uterine lining and continuing to listen to my mediation CD's as well as foot soaks though I have not been quite as diligent with the foot soaks. Elijah has been sick so I have been a little limited. I feel like the next few weeks are going to go by so slowly. Usually my days fly by with the business of running our home and taking care of Elijah but so far the days seems to to go pretty slow as the anticipation builds.
March 15, 2013
Cycle Day 6
I had another check in at the fertility doctor today. Nine follicles on one side and ten on the other. The uterine lining looks good. It is at a seven and the ultimate goal is a ten but we still have several days to get there. The nurse thought that we would begin the Centrotide today which blocks potential early ovulation....something we do not want when we are undergoing IVF....but apparently the follicles are not large enough for this to be a concern although my estrogen was high enough for the Centrotide to be considered. Part of me feels like "Okay, why aren't the follicles bigger then???". Like I failed some sort of test. So stupid I know. Ultimately God is in control anyway. As I have been told several times....HE'S GOT THIS. So I need to just stop stressing. I really haven't stressed up until now. It has been mostly anticipation and excitement....and it still is. But the thing about IVF is...if it fails, it is not like you can just try again next month like anyone else trying to conceive a baby. I mean, I guess you can if you have that kind of money lying around but it is so much more than "Oh well. Better luck next month". Which is not to say it doesn't suck when people who can conceive naturally take a little longer but this is a whole different level. But there is one thing that will not change no matter what the outcome of this cycle. I am a mother. I have a son. And he is AMAZING. So bring it on. God's got this.
May 17, 2013
Cycle Day 8
Well, I had a message from the nurse yesterday and started the Centrotide last night so I feel like I am back on schedule! I had a check in today and my uterine lining is THICK THICK THICK! The ultimate goal is for it to be at 10 (I'm not sure what the measurement is) and I am already at amost 12 with several days left for thickening! I have an incredibly ideal environment for growing babies! I know the avocados, macadamia nuts and olive oil have totally paid off! I bought a few more avocados today as well as more macadamia nuts and will choke them down for the next few days but I will not be sorry to see them go. I really normally like the foods but am def tired of them! I still have nine eggs developing on the left side but now have 13 on the right. However they are not as developed as the we would like to see so the nurse said she thinks the doctor will be increases my stimulation meds which hopefully I will only be on for three more days counting tonight. The nurse still believes I will trigger ovulation Monday and have my retrieval Wednesday. I can feel my hormones raging now..........the past two days have been especially bad. But I continue to pray, meditate and am taking more time to relax.
Later in the day.......I got my email from the doctor's office and they are NOT increasing my meds which tells me the doctor thinks the size of my follicles looks good! :) Looking forward to a nice weekend with my family and hopefully news of my trigger shot on Monday. It is incredible to look at Elijah and thinks this is how he started. At one point, he was in one of those follicles that the nurses and I were looking at on the ultrasound. He was one of those eggs that they told me fertilized when I got "the call" after retrieval. And out of the four healthy embryos we got from the first IVF, he was the one that was healthy, implanted and stayed put for nine plus months. It is just incredible. As I look at the image on the ultrasound, I imagine which little baby or babies will be next. Which of these follicles that I am looking at are going to produce the egg(s) that are to be our children.
May 20, 2013
Cycle Day 11
Well, I went into the doctor's office today anticipating that I would trigger ovulation tonight putting my retrieval on Wednesday as planned but the nurse said my follicles looked a bit immature still and she thought that Dr. Williams would want me on stim meds for an extra day. I just got the call and he wants me on them TWO extra days. I had prayed that Dr. Williams would have the knowledge to make choices that would give us success and I am sure that is what is going on here but two extra days added on to everything (retrieval, transfer and ultimately pregnancy test) kind of sucks. The end result is what is important but all this waiting is for the birds. I know babies are SO WORTH THE WAIT but I am just ready to be pregnant again. I remember with my FET for Elijah, they had problems with their and I was bumped back a whole week. I almost cried when I got that call. In fact, I think I did cry. I may have even been on stim meds an extra day with the original IVF. It just messes with my head a little. But by Friday......yikes that seems so far away......I will be having my eggs retrieved. And it sort of works out for the better in some ways. My chiropractor was not going to be able to see me the day before the transfer and now she will!
May 23, 2013
Cycle Day 14
Yesterday I had another check up with the clinic......and everything looked AWESOME! My uterine lining was at almost 13 mm, I had 32 follicles, 20 of which looked mature and lots looked VERY mature at 20mm or more! Praise God! The nurse told me that every looks ideal for success!!! That two days made so much difference. God really knows what he is doing! And so does Dr. Williams! So last night I did my trigger shot which means my retrieval is Friday. I have been soaking/scalding my feet in a hot foot bath every night the last couple days (though it is beneficial to do it all through the cycle) and going on walks every day (which I used to do but had gotten out of the habit in recent months. This also helps circulation which is supposed really help with implantation. I also keep warm socks on my feet at all times when I am home. And today I will be going to my chiropractor for a pre retrieval adjustment. I am torn between wanting to have lots of healthy embryos to work and just a few really good ones. I want all my embryos to be of the best quality but this is a situation where you don't want too much abundance. After all there are only so many kiddos we can have. I just pray that the two little embryos that they transfer next week implant....take root and grow grow grow! I am feeling very positive and hopeful but it is also such a scary process.
May 25, 2013
Cycle Day 16
Yesterday was my egg retrieval. I was put under general anesthesia and the doctor "harvested" 19 eggs. I had 32 follicles but not all were mature and the doctor told me ahead of time that she was just going to go after the best ones. I spent the rest of the day relaxing while my mother in law and Chip took care of Elijah and me. It was nice to get to relax. I was a little achy but nothing too bad. Last night I had a terrible time falling asleep. I am so anxious to be pregnant.....so anxious to have my babies back inside of me. I kept thinking about how right now, my eggs are being fertilized....right now is the beginning of life. I know that sleep will not come easy over the next days and possibly weeks. Today I was still feeling kind of bloated and sore. I got the call late morning reporting that we have 12 embryos. TWELVE. Such a divinely significant number. 12 tribes of Israel. 12 days of Christmas. It as brought to my attention that God likes 12. Now the last time we did this process, I had 25 eggs and 15 fertilized resulting in 4 good embryos and 2 pregnancies (1 early miscarriage). So we are so far working with less than we did last time. But I feel God's presence in this process and shall not be discouraged. So the morning went well. Then as the day wore on, I got more and more uncomfortable. Chip reminded me that when they harvest eggs, they blow up your abdomen with air and that I went through pain last time. Well it really started to hit around 4pm and we were at a friends house. It was definitely time for me to go home. Talk about pain. Gas pains, constipation. It's not pretty but it is part if the harsh reality of this process and I want me testimony to be accurate so my sisters can know what to expect. Seriously, these were as bad as labor pains. I was literally doubled over moaning on the way home. But as all things do, this too shall pass. (no pun intended) and the waves of agony are fewer and further between. And totally worth it by the way. 4 more sleeps until my babies are back in my belly.
May 28, 2013
Cycle Day 19
Pregnancy Eve. At least I pray that is what it is. Tomorrow, around 7:30am Dr. Williams will transfer two of the best embryos into my waiting womb. I have done all I know of to prepare for this moment both mentally, spiritually and physically. I have been soaking my feet in HOT water at night and going on nightly walks to help with circulation. I began my progesterone shots two days ago. Chip has not lost his touch! (He administers the shots in my heinie.) This is going to end up being a really short update because Elijah is having a very "needy" day. I think he senses change.
May 29, 2013
Cycle Day 20
T Day. Transfer day. Well yesterday the surgery center called me at 5:30PM and told me that I was being bumped to 12:30PM. This meant several things. I would NOT be the first in and therefore would be effected by the day's delays. It would also mean that my BFF could not watch Elijah so that my mother in law could accompany us for the transfer as she did when we had our FET for Elijah's conception. This was devastating......at first. Afterall, they are dealing with hormonal, emotional, INFERTILE women here! This kind of change though seemingly minor, could really just break such a person. Well I have been praying (so hard) for the Lord to work especially on the two embryos that He already knows will be the ones chosen for the transfer. Who am I to know or say if this is not His hand in that? Perhaps there are circumstances that I may never know which I may never know, involving my babies that made this necessary. Could this be another lesson in patience. I have had several of those this cycle. I just pray this is the LAST one involving conception and that this cycle is THE CYCLE. It also occurred to me that as much as Elijah loves Heather (my BFF), he has stayed with Grandmother (my mother in law) often and this might be what is best for Elijah. All of those thing made me at peace if not still a little agitated. I realized that the morning might now go by pretty slow so I let Elijah stay up late (8:30pm) with the thought that MAYBE he would sleep in a bit. When he goes to bed at 7:00PM he wakes up around 6:00am. Yeah. No. That did not work. He was up at 5:30. And all I could think is I have five hours before we need to leave. Granted, there are lots of things I now planed to do. I can get in one more walk and foot soak to boost circulation. I can actually do my devotions outside while Elijah plays instead of trying to focus in the car or waiting room. I can have some time with Elijah in the morning before I turn over all duties for the next 5 days and lots of duties for hopefully the next nine months. I might even wear him a bit since I will probably not be able to do that for a while. These are all good things. So it is 6:00AM and I will wait patiently and go about my day. In a few (hopefully short) hours, my babies will be back in me where they belong. And I pray they are healthy, strong and ready to implant!
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| Transfer day! |
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| Getting some time in with my favorite little boy before this bit T! |
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| Quick family photo. Could this be the last time we are a family of THREE????? |
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| Waiting to go back to the O.R. |
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| It's show time! |
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| Snuggling Elijah's bedtime lovey. I wanted a little piece of him with us on this day. |
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| A few moments of prayer and mediation before we begin. |
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| Babies' first photo! How many people get to see what their kiddos look like at five days gestation! |
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| Catalina.......she got me through the last pregnancy and I know she will get me through this one too. She is THE nurse at Houston Fertility. She took a break from her ultrasound and check up duties to come give us a good luck hug after the procedure. I love this woman and am so grateful to have her in our lives. |
I'm home now beginning my 5 days of bedrest. This morning I took a walk, did my guided mediation and a self fertility massage. Transfer went great! Two perfect embryos are nesting in my womb as we speak! For the next five days I won't have any dairy (not unusual for me) only warm or room temp food and will lay down. I also am keeping a pillow under my butt for the first day or two
Bedrest....What I did
1. I did almost a whole day extra of bedrest and then took it easy throughout what would be the fifth day.
2. No cold food or drink, even water. It makes your uterus contract. You want to be as relaxed as possible
3. Keep on warm socks. This helps with circulation. Again, good for the uterus and implantation.
June 2, 2013
Cycle Day 24
(Drum Roll Please.........3 Weeks 2 Days PREGNANT!)
It is not official and it is a VERY FAINT positive but it has been agreed that it is a positive nonetheless. It is VERY early and my beta numbers are probably around 15...the hormone literally just starting to be produced. I am guessing that number because the dollar store tests that I used pick up at 25 and it is so faint it barely picks it up but it is definitely a PINK line! I go to the the clinic tomorrow to check my progesterone level and I am going to let the nurse know and see if they want to go head and start my Beta testing. With Elijah I got a pretty clear positive at about 3 weeks 4 or 5 Days so this seems right on for my beta numbers with him which thrills me because our numbers were so strong so early. Chip is still in the "don't count your chickens before they hatch" mode and I am trying not to be over excited but see for yourself!
June 4, 2013
Cycle Day 26
3 Weeks 4 Days Pregnant
It is definitely there....that little pink line. In fact, I got a digital YES as well! Elated and grateful to God for this blessing. There is a "but". Last night I woke up to some cramping and had kind of a rough day yesterday where I overdid it. Now I did have chili for dinner and it COULD have been gas but any kind of pain other than LIGHT cramping is scary in pregnancy and it is so early and fragile right now. So today I am taking it very easy. I have taken lots more pregnancy tests (as you would see if you walked into my house cause they are all over the place) and it seems like everything is okay but at this point, even if my beta levels began to drop, you could not tell from a test HPT because they don't test amount of the hormone, just its presence except of course at the very beginning when you get those faint positives. So my hands are folded in prayer as I pray for the life within. It is a waiting game and I am hoping to exhale in a couple days. By then if I still have a strong positive, I will feel confident.
June 6, 2013
Cycle Day 28
3 Weeks 6 Days Pregnant
Well the morning sickness has started. It is mild but there. And reassuring. I actually don't mind it because it indicates a healthy pregnancy. What I am not a fan of is that for the past three days I have felt like I swallowed air that will not release. It is painful and making my tummy very tender. I am hoping this goes away soon....unless it is serving some protective purpose, then I will gladly shine it on.
